MY DUMB AZZ: I’m So Slow

In 2012, college was coming to a close for me and in line with the longstanding tradition, I went to the hottest(it’s Montgomery) club(near the school) in town! The club was always packed and although dorms were cleared the day prior, every one was there. I’d just become single and was ready to be free.

My entire senior year, I noticed a freshman young lady and not because I thought she was cute(which she kinda was) but because she had a peculiar look. She was an athlete so I hardly ran into her. I didn’t think much of it. With the 8-12:1 female to male ratio, I tried my chances with other women. 

Back to 2012, I was in the club sitting against the wall and people I knew would congratulate me on graduating. One person was a former teammate of mine from Quiz Bowl. He heard about me being single and pulled this girl over and said “Have you met Ronarro? He’s graduating next week.” 

We exchanged pleasantries and she said it was a shame that I was graduating and that we could have fun. I agreed and I noticed her tilting her head at me. She kept standing there and I’m like “Is she gonna leave or…?” By the third time she nodded I noticed a light coming from her mouth…her tongue was out…revealing her tongue ring.

Instead of immediately getting her number, MY DUMB AZZ said “Oh that’s cool…it was nice to meet you.” And she walked away. 

I thought about that situation a lot. I missed out on a really good story.